In general, there’s a stigma that a younger woman dates an older man because he’s more powerful and can essentially take care of her.And while that may be true for some, a 2010 study by the University of Dundee in Scotland found that as women become more financially independent, their taste may skew toward older (and better-looking) men. As a woman becomes more confident in her own career and finances, she seeks a partner who matches that, which often is not a 25-year-old guy. When you make the initial contact if it is just for casual sex that you are interested in please be upfront about it to save time on both sides. If you are straight forward it allows both of you to begin with the same expectations of sex. Anyone who’s been in a serious long-term relationship knows the journey isn’t without certain challenges, and when you’re dating an older man—we’re talking a decade or more—things can get even trickier.I know this firsthand, as I’m 25 years old, and I’ve been dating an older guy nearly 15 years my senior for almost four years.
As Aaliyah once said, “If at first you don’t succeed, dust yourself off and try again.” Older men know this. I won’t lie: It can be annoying at times dating someone who has “been there/done that,” but it can also be helpful when your partner can use his experiences to guide you. If it’s honesty and directness you are seeking, know that many older woman come out way ahead in this area. Pay for her on the first date, even if she offers to pay her share. Don’t say you want to see her again if you are full of sh*t. And don’t do it because you are looking for a mommy. Don’t keep pestering her because it will come to an unhappy conclusion or blocking you from her site. Many of us are confident, used to being alone and on our own, so don’t feel that we want to be with you every minute of the day, because we don’t. Many of us had much experience with BS and we know when it’s coming at us. Again, it’s a turnon to a woman to have the man go out of his way to meet a woman. Same goes if you are going to meet at a certain time, and you are going to be late, text her and let her know. Neither one of you knows ahead of time where this will go. The most important is in getting to know one another, having fun, being honest and upfront. But once you go that route if you feel uncomfortable don’t do it. Give us at least some sample of what you look like. Please don’t make your profile sooooo long that it will totally bore us and even though you may look good, you will be passed by because of overwhelm. Most cases if a woman doesn’t respond to your first response, it means she’s not interested. Be aware that if we see something ain’t workin for us, but working for you and we can’t work it out, that’s probably the end of the relationship. If she’s desperate and is afraid of being alone, stay away, far, far away. She has had a lot of experience in having fun with children.Evolutionary psychologists say that relationships like this often occur because while fertility lasts only from puberty to menopause in women, it starts at puberty and can extend long into midlife for lots of men.That means there’s a strategic advantage for women to snag an older gent—he’s had more time to accumulate resources and stability than his younger counterparts, which could make him a more viable partner and father. If she feels you are totally into learning about her that is a real turn on, especially if you have a sense of humor. Just like you don’t want someone to misrepresent themselves to you, don’t misrepresent to them. She will want to meet you in a public place and allow her to make arrangements to meet, mainly in her hood. If you can’t then text her and make a plan for another time. We know at this stage about not changing the other person but accepting them the way they are. If you have children, don’t be afraid of introducing her to them. It’s uncomfortable for both, and there’s no way of having any kind of fun or spontaneous conversation. If the picture you have online is what she will see in person, don’t come walking in looking nothing like your photo, either being fifty pounds heavier, the photo was taken when you were twenty years younger.It can be tough when you and your older partner can’t share childhood commonalities (dude’s never read a book!?), but the benefits can certainly outweigh those little things.That said, there are not-so-little things that can cause friction too.Keeping in mind what I’ve learned from my own relationship and anecdotes I’ve picked up from women in similar situations, I’ve outlined the perks and challenges of dating an older man. I get asked a lot of questions about my boyfriend’s finances (why else would I date someone much older, right? It’s not actually anybody’s business, but I can tell you that I’ve never dated anyone because of money.