When I was in my early 20’s, my father told me that the best way to find what I was looking for was to write down all of the qualities I wanted in a partner. I still remember a few, because they’re qualities I continue to look for — creative, gets along with their family, down to earth, ambitious, has a “career” and not just a “job” (a very important distinction for a career-oriented gal like myself). I ripped a page out of one of the many Moleskins I hoarded at the beginning of my journalism career and made two columns of qualities.I blamed myself for the entire situation, and would go over our meetings in my mind for hours. I was blissful for a few months — until two of my cousins’ impending weddings starting rearing their heads, and my anxiety about going to yet another family wedding alone beat out my cynicism over the men I’d been dating.So, I rejoined Bumble, started swiping, and matched with a guy named Jeremy*.If you want to meet someone just go ahead and tell her or him about it!Love Epicentre is created not only for people who are looking for love - here you also can find like-minded persons for joint travelling or just make friends all over the world.So why was I making assumptions based on someone’s declaration that they wanted a relationship? And must love double-chocolate fondant cake with a huge side of ice cream.Those two things should be treated the same way — as important dealbreakers, but not necessarily indicators of what’s to come.
Wasn’t it great that we were starting this partnership out on such an honest note? We’d have a few dates, share a few text messages, and eventually the thing would fizzle out completely. ” my mother would ask every time I told her about another guy who ghosted.
When the man across from me would say those four magic words, that was it. I’d roll my eyes and screech into the phone that The fact that these men and I had been so open with one another, and had outwardly said that we both wanted relationships, would send me into a shame spiral.
I’d convince myself that I had done something awful to make them not want a relationship with me.
On my first run out of the gate, I’d found a guy who wanted a relationship who also happened to be sweet and funny. This time, though, instead of getting sad about Jeremy’s disappearance, I tried to look at it objectively. He bounced around from job to job, which is fine for a lot of people, but is a little too flakey for me.
Sure, he wanted a relationship, he got along well with his family, and he made me laugh. He moved cities a lot, which is tough for a girl who loves to travel, but never plans to live anywhere outside the tri-state area.